Obedience

My thoughts are filled

with buzzing indifference

A thousand little nothings

barricade my consciousness

pushing at my skin

you wish me alone

so here I am

where are you?

If I was a rich man (8/2/21)

These headphones suck

Sleep is exhausting

Normalcy is a tragedy

with tragedy trending

pain is a currency

and here I'm a miser 

rich in agony 

not spaceships lacking

humanity

12/17

Sometimes,

Sometimes, 

Sometimes;

I'm trapped in me

And cannot leave

Sentience my labyrinth 

From which there's no relief

Exit signs are dimmed 

My mind dulls 

my weak will to live

Sometimes

Repeats

In my head

Sometimes, sometimes, sometimes

can you hear me?

Who is speaking?

It's worse to think

I never feel like me 

And I know it's not ok

I hurt those I cannot replace

Water is my lover 

and yet 

Losing my real lover 

I feel I lose myself

Serotonin hold me 

I'm sorry

My indiscretions 

show my imperfections

2020 #4?

 My talent is wasted on trivial things

I mourn for feelings

I can never keep

Childhood wishes                                   

                                                                                   float away

on stars unseen

Adult excuses 

cover deepened scars

and silenced dreams