I don't care (BPD)

I promise I don't
I promise that I will only spill lies
I will only spread false tongue
I'm happy
Can't you see?
I was a lady without you
(no)
I will be a lady as before
(for you)
And all the lessons you taught me
thrown away
(They are so close to my heart)
You cannot control me
(I will eat)
You have not affected me
(I see myself unharmed)
I don't care of your rules or the
promises I gave you.
(I am so sorry for my weakness)
I never cared for you
(Just one more time held)
I spit on your memory
(My beloved)
I long for your pain
(You are so beloved)
I hate you
(Please never leave me)